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Magical World

Wouldn't it be lovely if, with just a twitch of the nose, life, or any aspect of it could be changed. Instead, positive changes always seem to involve tremendously hard work, determination, and endless setbacks. How lovely it would be to have the powers of Samantha Stephens.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Friday

I woke up to a cloudy, cold morning. I was NOT feeling brave enought to face the cold for a morning run, so I postponed it till after the kids were at school. Our morning went smoothly--everyone got where they needed to go on time. I took my mom's graded/edited papers to her and went for my run. NO ONE WAS OUT AT THIS TIME!!! And while that normally wouldn't bother me, I found myself feeling a little exposed and lonely. We morning runners always exchange smiles and waves. It's a nice feeling--we're all different shapes and sizes, and at different fitness levels, but we respect the fact that we're OUT THERE, challenging ourselves, improving ourselves, doing what we love. However, I paced myself beautifully and ran nearly 6 miles before I had to get back for a rehearsal.

I showered quickly and made it to my rehearsal (late). It didn't go well. I'm accompanying a singer who's insecure about her voice. I hate that. They always ask me for advice--like I know anything about singing!!! She actually sings quite well, but just lacks confidence. We finished after about an hour.

I went to work for a couple of hours. Usually my dad is around, cracking the whip, finding more for me to do, watching over my shoulder. I'm always telling him to get a life and let me work. We crack each other up. He wasn't there today--lonely AGAIN!!! I'm not liking this feeling. Six months ago I wouldn't have cared if I was alone--today, it's bothering me. My dad arrived just as I was leaving. We chatted for a few minutes, and then I left.

I called Darrin at work and asked him to go on a date with me tonight. I really MUST be lonely!! He was pleased that I did that--which is good because if he had said no, or that he was too busy, or that he had Bishop meetings, I WOULD have divorced him on the spot.

I took Tabitha to a nearby historical site to do some quick research for a school project. It was weird--I'm feeling a disconnect from her lately. Usually we talk non-stop, but I'm not feeling talkative around her. I forced myself to bring up a topic she'd be interested in. We need to stay close to each other. After a minute or two, my reluctance to talk left and we had a wonderful conversation. We stopped at Walmart and got some necessities. I bought myself another pair of jeans (Note to self: I am now at the smallest size Walmart carries. I HAVE to stop losing weight because I can't/won't afford shopping at specialty stores that carry smaller sizes. Also, I refuse to wear anything smaller than a 4. It makes me feel small, insignificant, weak--how weird is that????), and got Tabitha a t-shirt and some nail polish--she's happy!

Darrin and I left the kids at home to fend for themselves for dinner, and we went to see Firewall at the $3 theater. We like to go to movies there, more because the theater is historic, and the seats and aisles are larger. And we always see families and couples that we know, which is fun. The ticket price doesn't hurt either. My opinion of Firewall: Harrison Ford is getting too old to play this type of character. If he wants to play that role, he needs to be more buff. He looked elderly and desperate--not heroic. Also, this movie had the potential for some really cerebral plot twists, but the makers concentrated all their efforts on the VERY LONG ending fight scene, which was barely endurable. A poor execution of a fairly good story. This movie can't hold a candle to Clear and Present Danger or The Fugitive. I give it 2.5 stars :) .

Darrin and I got home around 9:30. We sat with the kids and chatted for a few minutes, then they went to bed. I mentioned to Darrin that David's computer had a virus which wiped his hard drive. Because one of Darrin's degrees is in the computer field, he gave me some good advice, and suggested I call David to get more information--maybe he could still recover some of his files. I called him. At 10:00 I told David I had to go to bed. He laughed at me because for him, 10:00 on a Friday means the night is still young. I promised to read and respond to his e-mail and said good-by.

I woke Darrin, and we went to bed. We were both so tired. It felt good to sleep.

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