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Magical World

Wouldn't it be lovely if, with just a twitch of the nose, life, or any aspect of it could be changed. Instead, positive changes always seem to involve tremendously hard work, determination, and endless setbacks. How lovely it would be to have the powers of Samantha Stephens.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The Best Part of Waking Up...

Five days weekly I teach seminary. This year we're discussing the Doctrine & Covenants--but it makes no difference to me what the topic is. I love the time I spend with the young men and women in my class. I know more about each of them than I probably should. I've talked to them individually, asked questions, laughed, hugged them. I know many things that hurt them, make them happy, frustrate them. Some are fluent readers, some are not--but all are willing to take a turn reading aloud a scripture or a quote when asked. Some get good grades easily, others struggle for their C's. There are many different ideas, personalities, and backgrounds coming together each weekday morning.

Sometimes it's as if I can feel their souls. There is an inherent goodness in each one of them. I'm very aware that some of them struggle with opposition daily in varying degrees. Some of that opposition is strong, and daunting. And yet they carry with them an undaunted spirit and an optimism in spite perceived troubles or sadness. They are very strong.

I wonder how much of what I say actually matters. Probably very little. It's the situation that is important--the coming together and gaining strength through common goals, camaraderie, feeling the Spirit (hopefully), and laughing--a lot. I am strengthened by these young friends. Each weekday, for just under an hour, I can escape from all that might make me sad, and spend time with some of the best people on earth. I listen to them talk and discuss. I laugh at David and DJ trying to play "I Heard the Bells" as an excruciating duet, while the rest of the class giggles as they sing. I hear the devotionals, some well-prepared, some less prepared, but all presented with willingness and a desire to express important thoughts to friends. I cling to the words of each prayer, and as they leave me each day, my heart says my own prayer entreating our Father to keep these beautiful young men and women safe--to help them know how important they are--to let them be aware of His love for them.

I wake up in the morning, happy that I am so blessed to have contact each day with my seminary students. If they take only a few things away from our time together this year, I hope it will be these:
1. Each one of them is a unique individual with a work only he or she can do (i.e., everyone has a "job" suited only to him/her).
2. Jesus Christ is the Savior of the world. Only through Him can we be redeemed. He has the ability to care for us when we are sad, hurt, angry, sinful, or wanting in any way. His love for us is greater than any other. Our love for Him should be no less.
3. We share a Father who loves us and has provided a way for us to return to Him. He has infinite blessings in store for each of His children. The receipt of those blessing (how many and to what extent) is our choice. He will allow us every opportunity to partake of all that He wishes to bestow upon us. He loves us enough to let us decide what to do with our lives, and He has set us free with the hope that our love for Him is sufficient to bring us back one day.
4. I love them. If they remember one thing about me, I hope it's that they know I love them.

Today I just have to acknowledge how incredibly blessed I am. It's not everyone who has the privilege of interacting each morning with some of God's choicest sons and daughters. I am doubly blessed in that one of those sons of God is also my own sweet son, and another is a very special friend. What more could I ask? I can't think of anything.

6 Comments:

  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 12:35:00 PM, Blogger Loyalist (with defects) said…

    Early Morning Seminary was one of the few things I really enjoyed during my high school years.

    I have no doubt that you are an excellent teacher.

     
  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 3:22:00 PM, Blogger Samantha said…

    I know, Xanadu. I'm so lucky. I get the best and the brightest. But maybe that's because I see better than you do...or God is a little closer...or perhaps I understand the worth of their souls on a different level than you can comprehend...

    I find it interesting that you are so blind and self-absorbed that you've robbed yourself of the opportunity to allow your life to be blessed by the choice sons and daughters of God that you are privileged to work with--after all, I only have a few--the entire line was "some of God's choicest sons and daughters." The quote should not be shortened or its context is misconstrued. But perhaps that was your aim. If so, I may have missed it. I tend to overlook mistakes the first time.

     
  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 5:50:00 PM, Blogger Samantha said…

    Xanadu: In reference to your petty argument about word choice--if it bothers you that much, don't read my blog. You weren't invited, and your inferences are inaccurate and unwelcome.

    As for being self-absorbed--well, in case you didn't notice--THIS IS MY BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!! Naturally it's self-absorbed. It's where I express things about ME!! I've made no claims about my blog existing for the benefit of humanity--it is simply and blatantly for ME! That being said, if you ask anyone who knows me, you'd find that the whole person spends little time worrying about herself, and just in case you were wondering--that time I spend with my students (that would be every weekday morning at 6:45 a.m.) is completely volunteer--I do it because I love them. Also, if you actually READ my blog, instead of just lifting it, you'd know that I've never claimed to be perfect, I'm very aware that I'm not, and that I work daily to try to improve myself--unsuccessfully, I'm sure, but I'll try till I die. I've confessed to hypocrisy, to feelings of unworthiness, to acknowledgement that the blessings I've been given extend far beyond my capacity or ability to receive them. Be careful what you say about me--YOU DON'T KNOW ME!

    For me, hate is not easier than love. Once again, you totally and completely missed the point (really, Xanadu, read with an open mind for once!). I've spent my life resisting those feelings because there was so much about my cousin that I loved. And the fact that he is the ONLY one for whom I've felt true hatred, but I love so many others, should back up the truth that love is easier. This is a step in my therapy--I HAVE to acknowledge my feelings because if I don't--I'll die. It's that simple. I have an eating disorder (which you'd have noticed if you'd read my blog with someone in mind besides yourself) that manifests itself because I don't know how to feel. So you are perfectly free to ridicule and demean my attempts to live, but your efforts to do so are extremely insignificant when viewed beside the huge effort I have put forth over the past year. THAT is an accomplishment that your tiny mind can't comprehend, or you would never venture to mock it.

    I've had enough. I've allowed you a voice on my blog because I believe everyone should have the opportunity to express. However, at this point, I'm just tired of you and your rhetoric. "The Book" that you call upon to back up your arguments is obviously another source from which you take things out of context. I believe you would find (again, if you actually READ IT) throughout "The Book", many, many times, God speaks out against the very relationships you defend as therapeutic and positive. Age difference aside, according to "The Book," having sexual relations outside of marriage is wrong--and marriage, according to "The Book" takes place between a man (which you, yourself, defined as around 17 years of age) and a woman (again older than a child). If you profess belief, if you use "The Book" to defend yourself, to back up your ridiculous arguments--you need to walk the walk, my pet. Either you believe it or you don't--that's just the way it is. And quite honestly, although there is no one who lives it perfectly, as long as you want to legalize a lifestyle condemned by said "Book"--you aren't even trying.

    You are welcome to categorize yourself however you please--you see yourself as reviled, hated, condemned. I suggest you take your pity party to a place where it will be not only welcomed, but appropriate--START YOUR OWN BLOG. Your musings are unwelcome here.

     
  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 7:03:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    An interesting battle we find ourselves in. Xanadu, I believe that God loves all of His children, but there does exist an "elect of God" category among saints on earth. I am not claiming to be among them, and I don't make judgment calls because only God Himself is justified in this, but certainly there is a difference in spiritual attitude between one who consecrates his/her very life for God and one who goes about destroying the lives of others.

    On a more important note, I think that you have an obligation, Xanadu, to leave Samantha's blog. You have entered into her healing territory and only created difficulty and frustration for her. I love her with everything that I am, and I wish to protect her and her desires. Please grant her wishes and voice your opinion elsewhere.

     
  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 9:06:00 PM, Blogger AttemptingthePath said…

    Xanadu,

    This blog is NOT a place for you to attempt to indoctrinate us. If you wish to talk about this--create your own blog and find your own online community.

    Go away.

    Leave this blog alone--No one cares. Go away. No one wants you here and no one cares of what you have to say.

     
  • At Tuesday, November 28, 2006 9:10:00 PM, Blogger -L- said…

    Xanadu, you are quite a piece of work.

    You have a very high opinion of yourself, excuse yourself of all responsibility for molesting children, paint yourself as the victim of society and a defender of "your kind". In reality, I think rank and file pedophiles are morally superior to you in every way I can conceive. You are shockingly evil, a "monster," to use your own word, not because you are a pedophile, but because you spend your best effort spreading lies, hate, angst, and suck your own satisfaction in causing suffering in others as shown here to the whole world wide web. Please make no mistake, I despise you not because you're a pedophile, but because your debased nature extends much deeper.

    I keep asking myself how many times you need to be uninvited to be here before you will gracefully go? How much effort does Samantha need to waste on replying to your ridiculous and laughably absurd comments before you will take the hint and walk?

    Don't answer, I already know. You stay and torment because it's your nature. You do it because you are a pathetic, mean person. And next, no doubt, I can expect to hear a defense of this misunderstood population of vilified pathetic mean people. I can't wait.

    I previously gave you an invitation to discuss your issues in a forum elsewhere that doesn't inflict unnecessary pain, but you ignored me and stayed where you feel you can safely bully someone vulnerable. Like a coward.

    Just go, and don't come back. Don't merely refrain from commenting, don't even VISIT.

     

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