Reasons Why I Shouldn't Sit Behind David During Messiah Practice

1. His stand partner's name really is David, which makes me giggle.
2. Sometimes he makes mistakes, which also makes me giggle.
3. Sometimes I make mistakes which makes me want to curse, although I never do but if I did he would hear me so I can't anyway.
4. We both hear the same audio typos from our conductor: "Choir! Keep those bowels open!!" Backward look from David. Sam cracks up and says, "This really isn't the place for that." Someone clues us in that the conductor actually said "vowels". Our interpretation is much funnier.
5. We both find humor in the audio non-typos from our conductor: "Choir! You're dying out on the word "Lord." Hold it out for the full value of the note. Don't let the Lord die!!" Backward look from David. Sam says, "Wait, this is Messiah. I thought that was the point." Sam and David laugh. No one else does.
6. David doesn't iron his dress shirt. That alone is reason enough for him to sit elsewhere.
7. Oboe stand partner doesn't like the fact that David and Sam think everything from carpet to ceiling tiles is humorous.
8. Conductor's patience seems to be wearing a bit thin.
9. It is difficult to play the oboe effectively while laughing.
10. I'm out of reasons. I think when David is gone next year, Messiah won't be half as much fun. I won't laugh as much. No one will get my jokes. The person in front of me won't look backward with a grin, admire my shoes, or tell me I have dainty feet (although that one was entirely unexpected--thanks, David!) Next year's prospects look grim...

I'm changing my mind. I love sitting behind David, and I only get to do it for one more rehearsal. You should all come to our performance on Saturday. David and I promise not to laugh. Plus we both look stunning in concert attire. And that's a good enough reason for anyone to want to attend.